Disappointments In Life

While channel surfing the other day I came across a reality show based upon the Duggards, 18 Kids and Counting. In the brief second I watched I learned something about disappointments, Mrs. Duggard was taking a car load of their children into town, one of the younger, about 5-6 was running behind the car crying loudly. Mrs. Duggard stopped the car, calmly explained to the little girl she was not permitted to come along this time, it wasn't her turn, she had to turn around a go back to the house. Surprisingly, she tearfully turned and ran back, into the waiting, comforting arms of her father. Mrs. Duggard then sweetly explained to the cameraman filming, that "she", the little girl, was of the age where she had to learn to emotionally deal with disappointment, then drove away. WOW, did I miss a memo or something growing up? I don't remember getting past feeling disappointed with things, other people, or even myself. In fact the past three years many opportunities presented themselves for continuing my emotional education.

Independent contractors...(out of work individuals)tend not to be what they present to be, work promised not to up to your dream level, time lines don't really exist either, nor does the "final" amount owed stay final. Now some people will place responsibility for failure upon my shoulders, as obviously I lost control over these situations at some point, and they would be right, hence disappointment in self.

So, I believe in people, trust them beyond the point most others would, willing to give most anyone a chance to prove themselves, wish everyone well, that isn't about to change. Sure, I am out some money, projects remain undone, my dream still unfulfilled. But none of that really matters, people do, respect matters, saving face matters, building relationships matter.

In the future, hopefully I will not disappoint myself as much, ask better questions, get things in writing if possible, and accept my dreams as long term goals without the added pressure of expectation. To me...disappointment comes from mis-communication of expectations, or lack thereof, so this is one area I will work to improve.

As for dealing with disappointment in others, well...everyone I dealt with was sincere, did their best, underestimated the job, over promised results, allowed personal problems to  intermingle with their professionalism. Frustration was felt by all, everyone wanting to walk away pleased with what they had done.

I chose to do exactly that...dreams can be less than realized in my time frame and life goes on... sometime letting others walk away with a modicum of pride and dignity for what they did accomplish was far more important....every one needs to provide for their family the best way they can, and given the chance, they will attempt to correct what they can, offer solutions if they have them, and be willing to help your visions happen. People are generally well meaning in intent, damaged humans however, occasionally have lousy follow through, but loving acceptance helps heal damaged souls, so take a risk sometimes, even though the outcome you receive may not be exactly what you expected!